So many of us are concerned with what other people might think.
While I was doing research for this weeks topic I got this reminder on Instagram.
For the past couple of weeks, I have been facing my demons and my concerns. Because of the times we live in we get caught in fear, overwhelm and anxiety. But I think on a deeper level we face so many demons and concerns, because we have kind of lost our identity, due to the labels we hang around ourselves.
Are these questions resonating with you? Then you must read on, my friend.
👉🏻 I have lost my job/ relationship/ house {insert any other loss you might have experienced}, what now?
👉🏻 What will people say if I build my own business/ if I go and travel the world/ if i sell my big house and fancy car/ go for that rejuvenating facial/ a spa experience in Bali?
👉🏻 What if I fail/ what if I don’t lik to travel/ what if I lost everything and then rebuild myself?
👉🏻 Who am I, a wife, a mom, a woman?
We get so stuck on one part of our being. This is such a typical example. You are invited to a party. Upon your arrival you are introduced to a couple of people and usually the conversation steers in a particular direction, “tell me more about yourself…” And we usually get stuck on what we do for a living. We kind of get stuck on the labels.
How many labels have you hung around yourself. Labels such as:
- mom
- wife
- lawyer
- doctor
- rich
- poor
- thin
- fat
- beautiful
- not so beautiful
- eataholic
- I love chocolates
- I am a shopaholic
- what about I love wine/gin/coffee
- I am overwhelmed/exhausted/fat/ugly
These are just to name a few of the labels we like to use.
My question for you today, are these labels part of your identity? Or is it something that has been passed down to you without you ever giving it any consideration.
Women today struggle with finding their identity and they are searching for a core sense of themselves. This search creates anxiety and overwhelm because we want to be perfect in every way. We also got stuck on the crazy expectation that people have of us. The unrealistic goals that we need to aspire to. And busy is expected of us.
This struggle creates a sense of urgency and scarcity. Rather it should be part of the emergence of what you would like to experience in life.
Discovering who you are should be a process, almost like the ebb and flow of a river. Discovering who you are should be about experiencing life and all it has to offer. Not living up to the labels and expectations of others.
* * *
I woke up this morning feeling anxious and overwhelmed, fearful of the things that might or might not happen. I did my morning meditation and journaling. In this contemplative state, I came to the awareness that I feel disempowered, I have given my power away. No one can give me my power back. Only I can take it back.
I want to be an empowered woman. This is part of our identity. Empowerment is also part of my teachings. If I don’t feel empowered, how can I empower other women.
When I became aware of this disempowered state, I also realised when I lost my empowerment. I allowed fear and judgement to creep into my life. I didn’t live according to my own values.
Empowerment is part of the character which defines identity. Identity determine who you are.
So many of us are concerned with what other people might think.
As a transformative coach for women, it is important that women understand the valuable role they play in society. But most of the time this role is played from a place of disempowerment. It comes from a place of lack and scarcity. We don’t own our truth, who we truly are and what we are offering.
In this blog
1. You need to raise your awareness
Take a moment and think where you are now. And then take a moment and think where do you want to be. What steps do you need to take to get to where you want to be.
This is awareness. Knowing who you are, where you are now and where you are heading.
2. You need a plan
If you aren’t happy with where you are currently, then you need to change that. What is that dream inside your heart that keeps you awake at night? What do you need to do to get to that place?
As we have learned from the Seven Habits, start with the end in my mind. See the bigger picture and then make a plan to get to that point.
3. Call in some help
John Maxwell is the great encourager of asking questions. You need to come into the habit of asking better questions. And the question for today, who do you know that will help you get closer to that larger-than-life dream? You need to get an accountability partner.
You can book your complimentary call with me here.
4. Create new routines
When you have a larger-than-life dream, you need to have routines and habits that support
I wrote an extensive blog post about the value of having a routine. You can click on this link to read.
Habits and routines are supportive to living a larger than live life.
You don’t need to be concerned about what other people think…
All you have to do is get up, dress up and show up to the life you want to live. Don’t become limited by labels, fear and judgement. You only have one live, don’t be full of regret when you are lying on your deathbed.
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